Five Festivus Grievances for Online Video

Festivus, the alternative to Christmas introduced in an episode of Seinfeld more than a decade ago, is still going strong. In keeping with that faux holiday spirit, it’s time for the annual “airing of the grievances,” which according to Wikipedia, “consists of lashing out at others and the world about how one has been disappointed in the past year.”

I’m talking to you, NewTeeVee Industry. Here’s how you’ve let me down.

1. Lack of originality with web series. Thankfully the girl-with-camera-news-craze seems to have slowed, though it looks like everyone is just jumping on the sci-fi series bandwagon instead. And so help me, if read one more pitch that includes the phrase “It’s like ___________ meets The Office,” I’m gonna scream. It’s called “new” media, not “re-hashing old” media.

2. Too many cords. This one is more for my wife, who considers the rat’s nest of cables connecting various set-top boxes to our TV set an eyesore. Either consolidate everything into one magic box, or hurry up and pick a wireless standard.

3. More HD streams. I know our Internet infrastructure can’t really handle all HD, all the time yet, but now that I’ve seen Netflix (s nflx), Hulu and even YouTube in streaming high-definition, I can’t go back to cruddy video quality. Stream everything possible in HD, now.

4. Licensing issues. Ugh. I can understand licensing windows (barely). Studios still want people to watch TV shows on a TV first. OK, fine. But once a show airs, there is no reason why it shouldn’t live online forever. Quit yanking shows off Hulu and littering the web with dead embeds.

5. Bandwidth caps and metered access. They stink, they’ll stifle innovation and the only “winners” will be the greedy cable and telcos.